Watch a 9-months-pregnant jwoww describe the consequences of her ‘puffy butthole’

Cocoa butter can help heal stretch marks, and an expert masseuse knows how to relieve swollen, achy feet. But in the scope of pregnant lady problems, there’s simply no recovering from a “puffy butthole.”

On tonight’s “Snooki & JWOWW” premiere, Jenni Farley, who was nine months pregnant while filming Episode #1, admitted that, much to her surprise, she’d been experiencing a romantic renaissance and, every so often, would even unlock her infamous ironclad chastity belt. But the roses wilted and the love potion soured when JWOWW woke up one day and experienced what might have been — but wasn’t definitely — mood-killing hemorrhoids.

In this video, JWOWW recounts the horror of finding her backside a little bit out of sorts, and her main man Roger Mathews simply didn’t know how to proceed. That sh**’s not in the how-to books, ladies and gents…

“That day the revelation happened, you yelled my name, and I was eating an innocent bowl of cereal,” Roger recalls in the clip. “You asked me to come up and look at something, and when I ventured up the stairs, and into the bedroom, you were standing there naked.” And that, friends, was the end of this love story’s chapter. Guess Rog will have to wait until the next…

Tell us if you’re shocked by Jenni’s admission, and stay tuned for Episode 2 next Wednesday at 10e/7p!