What if mark ruffalo in 13 going on 30 was more sinister than we thought?
The 2004 rom-com 13 Going on 30 taught us that being an adult wasn’t always a blast, but it was a lot better if Mark Ruffalo was your bae. But apparently we all totally missed the supernatural element in the movie, according to Reddit user Tibret’s entertaining fan theory.
The long and short of it? Matt Flamhaff (Ruffalo) is actually a warlock who’s pulling all the strings.
Tibret’s “evidence” would take longer to read than it takes to eat an entire bag of Razzles, so here are the major points.
DREAM HOUSE, PART I
Tibret sees the sequence of events for this scene — Young Matt (Sean Marquette) gives Young Jenna (Christa B. Allen) the fancy dream house, bad things happen, she wishes to be 30 — as a red herring: “The magic sparkles combined with the enchanted totem were going to cast this spell [no matter] what she was chanting.” Matt is Jenna’s BFF and confidant, so it’s not a stretch to assume he knows a ridiculous amount about her. “Why does Matty have a magic doll house and sparkles if he’s not magic?”
DREAM HOUSE, PART II
When Jenna (Jennifer Garner) is finally transformed back into a moody teenager, it’s because Matt decides to give her back the enchanted totem, now that she wants him.
Also, are we seriously supposed to believe a grown man kept his not-Barbie dream house present for 17 years? Especially when all it symbolizes to him is the day his friendship with the girl of his dreams died a painful, ’80s-enthused death? No, the only reason he’d still have that thing would be to finish “Operation: Get Jenna Rink To Love Me,” which ultimately works.
MATT’S NEGGING THROUGHOUT THE MOVIE
“This entire ’future’ is magical negging,” Tibret writes. “It’s there to show Jenna what a bad person she is without Matty.” After the Dream House/Six Chick Fiasco Of 1987, Young Jenna goes from being a nice kid to a total bitch. So Young Matt uses his sketchy dust to make his love stay.
Warlock Matt cleverly rejects Jenna just when she wants him, and that’s when he proves he has complete control over her. His wedding to Wendy (Lynn Collins) “adds a real sense of urgency for [Jenna]. Such urgency that when she ’returns to the past’ she gives [Matt] a big smooch immediately,” Tibret writes. And thus, the magical spell is fulfilled, because then we’re jetted 30 years forward again and Wendy is nowhere in sight during Matt and Jenna’s wedding. As it should be.