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Confession: We’ve grown borderline obsessed rather attached to the MTV Floribama Shore crew.
Maybe we’re in denial it’s over and refuse to move on, but if we’re being honest, we’re still thinking about our favorite Southerners. Which is why we’re making a wish list of what we’d like to see unfold for each cast member — you know, if we had a good genie on hand. But for now, let’s just pretend, shall we?
Nilsa: A barrel-chested freedom fighter
And not just any BCFF, mind you. He would have to be a broad-shouldered serviceman who doesn’t cheat (*cough* Nilly’s ex) and doesn’t dump a girl mere minutes before a romantic date of putt-putt. (We’re looking at you, Josh.)
Candace: Her own advice column
Wise beyond her years, Candace is often the much-needed voice of reason on MTV Floribama Shore.
Aimee: A rich husband
Obviously so the outspoken blonde can swap her princess-goddess-mermaid status for the title of “trophy wife” and never work another day in her life.
Kortni: A toilet night light
They really do exist. And this way, the hardcore “potty” girl will never miss the bowl again!
Jeremiah: A T-shirt
Or a tank top. Or Gus’ flannel back thong. It’s fine to take it off when Kayla Jo’s around, but not when the parents come to visit. Please.
Kirk: A year’s supply of grilled chicken
So he’ll never get hangry again!
Gus: A wife who lets him eat cheesecake off the floor
Nilly wasn’t having it when this future Fabio tried to nosh dessert off the ground, but surely there’s some nice lady out there who wouldn’t mind.
Codi: A million bottles of sunscreen
It wasn’t a proper day at the beach if Codi wasn’t lathering on 57 layers of SPF. (And if he plans on rocking his American flag Speedo again, well, sunscreen is all the more necessary.)
If you could grant the MTV Floribama Shore cast eight individual wishes, what would they be? Share ’em in the comments — and while you’re at it, tell us your favorite moments from this season!